Silke, I know exactly how you feel. I would love to tell my friends or one of my brothers about this place and all the lovely people I have met here not to mention the love I have found within these walls.

I know they would never understand unless they had the same tendencies as I. I can't take the chance so it all stays bottled up inside me except for all my friends here who always lend an ear when I really need one.

I don't know how you can broach the subject with your friends because I don't know your friends. You have to be able to read them and guess their reaction. Though I know I wouldn't lose any true friends over anything I told them, they would always look at me differently and feel sorry for my wife. Knowing all this I do keep my mouth shut. You have a little advantage over me in that you have no husband to worry about. That to me would be a big plus in allowing me to speak freely. Still you don't want to lose any friendships over your confessions of sort. See I do know how you feel and I feel for you.

I have one dear friend who happens to be a female and we have been close for well over 50 years now. I know one of these days I will email her telling of my new friends and secret life. We know so much about each other I'm sure she won't be judgmental but I still hesitate. Why, I can't really say except maybe I'm not as sure of her reactions as I think I am. Maybe I'm secretly ashamed of the way I have become liking the kinky side of life and the fact that is has become such a large portion of my life. I do spend many hours a day here and that is certainly a difference in my habits since just a few months ago. My wife even asks why I'm at the computer so much lately and I want desperately to tell her but, again, I cannot.

How do I explain my love for Aussiegirl? A lovely lady I know only from here and by the beautiful words she says to me. How do I tell them my marriage commitments are still in tact but I love Aussiegirl with my entire heart because I know her heart and soul inside an out? Would you understand if you knew my life history as all my friends do? Would you understand if you were my wife of many years? I think not so I will remain only talking to all you, my dear friends, here at my second home.

Thanks for the chance to talk, silke. Sorry I don't have better advise for you.