I can relate to you Mourning glory.In my family,first cousins are treated like real brothers and sisters,so it was very difficult for me to accept that I was sexually attracted to one of my cousins(she is a vision of loveliness)She and I have always been very clode and whenever she comes over we sleep in the same room.she and I have a very special bond and hardly keep any secrets from each other.I think she is attracted to me too,but there is no way I would risk damaging our relationship by coming out in the open with her.So I sublimate my emotions by pampering her to my heart's content.It keeps me on an even keel.My advice for what it's worth is to not risk your relationship.