Quote Originally Posted by aria_1 View Post
I think I need to reiterate my post.
I tend to babble on at times without ever getting to the point that I wanted to make in the first place.
I know that no one can give me a "quick fix" answer, and that I alone must make my decision and accept the consequences (be they good or bad) that will subsequently follow.
What tends to make me stop though, is that I read about people who are unhappy with thier decisions, and people who live the lifestyle, who say that it is probably easier for people such as myself to stay where we are, and live Vanilla.
The negativity I receive seems to outwiegh the postive aspects, and makes my decision that much harder to weed through.
I have already decided who I am and what I want, but I stall in making a start to get to where I want to be, and begin to second guess myself.
What I am really wanting to know is how happy people are who have made that decision to switch lifestyles, and how difficult it was in the beginning, and how they made it easier.
Easy and safe doesn't make it good. My life is a lot more complicated than it could have been if I'd done the vanilla thing. I was quite young when I started in the whole BDSM thing, so I don't really have a before life to compare it to.

I think you need to decide if it's just a sexual fantasy, or if it's something deeper. There's more to it than just having BDSM sex. When you have sexual fantasies, what do they entail? Would you like to live out those fantasies? There's plenty of people who are content with only fantasising about dominance, (or whatever) while masturbating but would never ever like to live it out in any other setting. There's really no right or wrong and nobody can tell you how you will feel about it. Nobody. You won't find out until you take the plunge.