CoV,

I think you need an injection of confidence. You have to take control of your sub. It's a bit of a spiral because if you don't project that you will not inspire it in your sub. BDSM is a lot more about the MENTAL link you form. Similarly if you LOOK like you know exactly what you are doing, remain consistent with boundaries and follow YOUR plan you will project confidence. Think of what YOU want to acheive from your sub and then extract it from her ( within agreed limits of course ). For punishment and reward have a few ideas to hand, a repertoire that you can do for each and pull out when needed, some light and brief, some more severe, depending on her behaviour and manner. Do not hessitate to exercise them.

If she is good tell her that she is from time to time, after you have established yor authority, if she's anything like me, she'll love to be found pleasing. I get a warm glow if my Master or Mistress calls me 'good girl' or 'good slut'. Tell her you may let her cum today. It's pretty simple, if she's good she gets rewarded, maybe

If she's bad she can't cum, certainly tell her this, it will work better if she's horny, you could stimulate her to that state and then make the point to her. She could be packed off to bed helpless and in heat to sweat for a night. If she is displeasing, negatively re-inforce it with warnings and then punishment.

Then get her to do what YOU would have her do and guide her approriately through it. Be picky with her to emphasize your control and enahnce your satisfaction. When you have a bit more co-operation from her, then is a good time to make her do something she finds humiliating to drive the point home a bit.

Just a few ideas. Hope you get that little subbie standing in line. That's, I'm sure, what she really needs.

x