Thanks everyone,
I wondered why I even posted this...but I was reading one other personal story about abuse here and was about to post on theirs.
This was not attract attention but more to say it's out there everywhere, maybe hoping to share and show it is not necessary and no one deserves abuse...nor should they shoulder all the responsibility.
I spent the first year wondering what the heck happened, why it was happening, so angry and upset, blaming myself for not being there for them more but I know now I could not have given more and I was becoming so messed up. It was really hurting me and my instincts, mind, heart...everything was saying (more than once...it is time to leave) I did talk to them and sent them emails saying I thought they needed help, but this was not my place to do so and making everything worse and worse.
I feel bad for them and hope they do or have gotten help for they have much good inside. There was a lot of miscommunication or lack of communication even between them...one so afraid to speak the truth for fear of consequences and one not wanting to hear the truth.
There was grief and anger over this also. So many strong emotions to sort through.
I was not an angel myself. I riled against her accusations and became angry and hurt instead of shrugging it off, seeing she was in so much angst, it was also hard for me to get through the doubt...was he really abusing her or is she messing with my mind?
Now I am happy it is over, yes there was a lot of joy in here too believe it or not and that is what is coming stronger now, what I am allowing to come through.

Everyone has the power and control to pick positive out of negative and learn from both as well as guiding their own life and finding out what it is they really do want. It's hard sometimes, but is possible...and it is important to continue growing and learning, keeping an open mind and accept "I" do make many many mistakes, as does everyone else.