thank you ruby. that was very insightful of you, and i appreciate you taking the time to respond. fortunately, we don't have children to impede us. but in answer to your question to me...yes i have. we had that once. where he would leave me a list of things to accomplish during the day before he got home from work. i liked that...gave me something to do 'for him' and for me. put me in a better submissive frame of mind. we both knew early on, we didn't want me crawling around behind him on my hands and knees 24/7. we both knew i didn't need micro-management of my day. i know what has to be done daily, and just do it. with or without prompting. so i guess that was redundant for him to leave lists..it fell by the wayside. its just so much more than the play. as i'm sure you understand. the play we have is fantastic. the stuff fantasies are made of. and for that i am truly grateful. for HIM..i am truly grateful. i hope i don't sound whiney or 'princess-y'..its not my intention. i am seeking insight and suggestions..all of which have been valid. and welcome.

thank you all again