Satan..its not about being 'ashamed' as much as it is being cut out of the will! i can't afford that! *wink*...i just don't feel as though my family needs to know about my darker side. its not their business..it doesn't affect them in any way...so i keep my blog fairly vanilla to avoid the discomfort of having to explain ANYTHING at all to them...typical WASP family....wouldn't/couldn't/ain't gonna try to understand the real 'me' ever.