Interesting discussion. I would have to agree on this. My mother was physically abusive somewhat but more than anything mentally abusive. My father was not- When I say abusive, I mean that she would erupt into bursts of anger over small infractions and then work herself into a froth before lashing out on us with a belt, plate--whatever was handy. She called it "discipline" but I call it abuse- (welts, etc...). BUT I don't associate it with my desired to be spanked NOW. I just like VERY aggressive MEN who totally take control and "force" :[ play with me- I'm sure some "shrink" would claim their's some Freudian subconscious connection- but I'd say no-