go to the knowledge section. and read aesops tips for beginners. great thread for you to begin with. as far as presenting that confidence that you want her to see. if you intend on doing something that is potentially harmful, such as whips or whatever, try it on an inanimate object first. make your aim, and stroke method perfect and you will have no doubt when with her. for the other stuff. just as you said. go slow. with impact play be careful of the kidneys and tail bone when using a flogger or other impact toy, and you will be fine.