Most of a woman's orgasm is in her mind. I can't say enough about masturbation! It's the best way to discover how your body works with no distractions, such as trying to please your partner. Though I've always been able to have an orgasm by myself, it's taken me 15 years to be able to have one, two, three, four or five with a partner, mostly due to being with the wrong partner for way too long! lol Once you find out what gets you off, be it clitoral stimulation, anal and clitoral, asphyxiation and clitoral or G-spot and clitoral (I'm a clitoral orgasmer), then it's important to have a partner who pays attention to what you tell him. But even with plenty of stimulation, sometimes it still won't happen if you're not in the right frame of mind. If you've had a bad day, feeling too tired and cranky, etc., take a hot bath, have a glass of wine and try to relax before going to bed. Foreplay starts early in the day, and having naughty emails or text messages sent to me hours ahead of time really help to put me in the mood. I also love dirty talk during sex! Tell me what a tight fuckhole I have....how sexy I am...how much you love my pussy to be so wet the juice is coating your balls....mmmm OK, um, now I've gone and done it...*sighs and looks at the clock* 6 more hours until I see VoodooMan....