I've been lurking around the forums for a few days now and reading stories and ideas behind others personal BDSM lives but I am still at a loss.

I am curious as to how someone starts the whole deal for the evening, for those of us who don't live the 24/7. How do I take controll and run the show. As I said before I've been the sub but I never paid attention to how we got into those positions. How did the humiliation work without it turning into verbal abuse? what kind'f things do you say to your partner? I'm so lost when it comes to being the dom, but I've been given the chance and would love to take it.