Quote Originally Posted by Curtis
Okay, I'm probably missing something here, but "Non-consensual slavery does exist in the lifestyle" doesn't seem to fit in with the rest of this post. Also, I don't agree with the statement. If it's non-consensual, it's criminal, and not part of 'the lifestyle' as that phrase is generally used in this Forum. The essence of BDSM is 'safe, sane, consensual'; if it's non-consensual, it's assault, rape, kidnapping, etc.
Curtis, you are preaching to the converted - however, the 'lifestyle' does not only exist within the boundaries of this Forum. Unfortunately the idealistic attributes 'safe, sane, consensual', which I believe I endorsed very strongly in my statement, are not universally accepted by all practising dominants. I felt it necessary to state facts, because of the nature of the question posed by this thread, which might have been taken as suggesting that submission, slavery and 'objectification' can be compared on the same level playing field. I do not consider that they are comparable on this basis, or equally acceptable, and I believe I explained my reasoning rather clearly.

We also have the same kind of problem that exists with other forms of domestic violence. The victim is often reluctant to pursue a complaint through the courts. Being submissive, taking such a form of positive action can often be psychologically difficult for a person whose ego has been systematically trampled on, even when the situation becomes intolerable and actual bodily harm has occurred.

Nobody can deny that many people who enjoy relationships involving bdsm experience gratification of a kind, or an intensity that otherwise does not occur. As in any loving relationship, I would like to think that the more effort is devoted to the pleasure of the partner, the more enjoyable it is. If one partner has no interest in the gratification of the other, as you rightly pointed out, the relationship is abusive, and legal sanctions should apply. The success of marriages or partnerships that do not involve bdsm is just as dependent on the unselfish attitude of both partners.

I believe that what I posted was both accurate, and directly relevant to the issues previously discussed in this particular thread. Hopefully what I have added was complementary to the previous discussion, and useful.