Submissives Taking the Initiative

[Master13]

I don't think that I would have a problem with my theoretical future sub girlfriend taking the initiative. I wouldn't consider it dominating from the bottem, because until someone takes the initiative and the other excepcts there is no top or bottem. Plus having someone ask me to "have my way with her" would be a big turn-on.

[subbiesarah]

my Master would take great offence if i tried to initiate a scene. We don't live together so when He comes over i will get a detailed email about how i'm to be dressed/presented - this must be followed to the letter. OK, i did ask him to fist me last weekend after a particularly horny scene but this was for His pleasure as much as mine (he requires me to orgasm as hard and often as possible).

[e.b.]

I'm somewhat ambivalent about this one. I enjoy getting to do a lot of talking/discussing/negotiating in general for the relationship's upkeep and think that discussing fantasies, interests, etc. is very important. I also agree that the time relaxing after a scene can provide a good atmosphere for discussion of preferences...what each person liked or didn't like, how they could better please the other, etc.

As far as actually starting a scene though, I don't think I'd feel comfortable doing that as a sub. Subtle hints or a submissively worded question can do a lot IMO to let a dom know the interest is there on the part of the sub, which is probably nice for the dom as I suppose we can't expect them to read our minds. I kind-of like some of nibbles' examples...just little ways to let the other know without being too blatant, which would probably cause many of us to feel like "pushy" subs.

I don't know how much of that makes sense...it's kinda stream-of-consciousness thinking, but thought I'd throw my two cents into the pot.

eb