Quote Originally Posted by slavelucy
i'm fascinated by what you have said, Donatien. Most notably the following bits:



i think this limited thought and action often causes us to mess up relationships and opportunities and only then do we notice our own behaviour. i don't necessarily think this is always "submissive or appeasing" though, speaking personally my own insecurities and...past issues often manifested in anger, it was a pure defense mechanism, but it prevented anyone from getting really close to me..and, in the mean time, pushed people away because they were hurt by it.

i don't much wanna go into it any more than that, but i just wanted to say i liked what you had written very much.

sl
I can totally relate to that!!
Just so that you know where I'm comming from, I have Dyslexia and I only found out at the age of 21. Before that I was labeled as a RETARD or LEARNING DISABILITY which I never really could say why. I went to special schools the lot. Now from when I was VERY young (from about 2 years old)
I couldn't talk very well and communicated by drawing. I would draw everything and my mother knew full well that my drawings did not resemble your typical 2 year old. No two year old can draw a three dimentional (scruffy and not too straight) picture of the inside of a telephone box from a birds eye view. Work that one out!!!
I would draw all the time but from the age of 4 I started drawing monsters and people but thepeople would be 'getting hurt' and my mother threw them away as she said they were disturbing. But if it wasn't drawing it was my dolls and teddies getting torchered. I didn't understand why but I know I knew then that I was getting a 'feeling' from this.
Growing up, well I am physically a very strong woman. One of my jobs was pallettising and a lot of 'mens' physical work. And my anger can be such violence but only when I've been pushed right to the edge. And yes I pushed everyone away who came too near.

I hope this can help you Donatien!!!