Quote Originally Posted by ^firefly^ View Post
nits fixed...bad me for not getting them the first time around!

And for the record, I liked the original ending, but I was told it was too abrupt....so this was my attempt to soften it. If it really sucks...well, I can always go back to the original!
this one doesn't really suck, i just liked the layering, the moments of softness and tenderness following all the hot stuff. i just liked that juxtaposition.