Sub vs. Stock?

[orchidsoul]

You're welcome! i am REALLY happy to have slightly allayed what is clearly (and justifiably) a serious concern for you. And, again, thank YOU for bringing the issue up, it's one that lies very close to my heart on a variety of levels and i've enjoyed clarifying a few things in my own mind.

sl x

I'm so glad it helped you out too sweetie. You always amaze me with your insight and how you work through thought processes.

it is vitally important to distinguish the difference between INFLUENCE and MANIPULATION

Great way of separating the difference Donatien.

where a submissive...on grounds of their extremity and compulsive/addictive nature embarks on a bdsm relationship , with a dom, lacking in the self discipline and maturity of mind to spot this

absolutely. It's very hard. I did not officially discover D/s from traumatic past abuse (although I was always into kinky sex- must be the Scorpio in me!!). It was after I recently had a relationship with someone that delved into the mind aspect. What I was willing to do, the lengths I would have gone through, and the love I felt was all indescribable. And I never met him. But I do believe there was a small amount of unintentional (I do stress unintentional) mental abuse to some degree. This is what got me to thinking about this whole subject. What part of me ALLOWED myself to sink into something so unattainable? And I think it goes back to the behavioral patterns we create with other individuals. The difference that Lucy has stressed is how there is positive and negative, but also how very, very important it is for a submissive to keep his/her strength in helping prevent the negative outcome. It is such a fine line. And even in cases where no mal intent is present. Apparently it needs to just remain very cognitive (ideally on both dom/sub side)in order to prevent any adverse outcomes. If not present on both sides, the outcome could be dangerous for one of the participants. Your insight was very much appreciated Donatien. Thank you.

In Psychiatry there is a condition called “Folie a deux” where it appears that two people living in one house are both Psychotic and share the same system of delusions . Yet in hospital, when they are separated it gradually becomes apparent that whilst the dominant partner is indeed Psychotic the weaker and more pliant one is quit sane but has out of love, and to keep the peace undergone a Stockholm type of mind/control , brainwashing , as a result of which they have adopted the others delusions genuinely believing them, until away from that situation and separate from it normality of thought resumes.

Soooo interesting. This for sure confirms basic classical conditioning.