Valued traits in the life.

[Donatien]

Whatever, dude.You do your thing, I'll do mine. Just quit picking apart my posts and preaching at me about what a relationship MUST have to be successful.

Excuse me! I am obviously under a misapprehension.
I had thought that the whole idea of a thread where someone postulated a point of view, as opposed to asking a question,
was to either agree , to amplify,to refine, or disagree, and in the last case offer constructive alternatives. E.G

I'm writing an article right now called "The Seven Essential Elements for Any Successful Relationship." In it, I list the following as absolute essentials:

Trust
Communication
Understanding
Compassion
Honesty
Respect
Commitment
RESPONSE--TG I have difficulty with your commitment to the use of this word in this thread; as unless qualifications such as mutual ,and caring, are added in front of it, it could be describing the commitment of a sadist to complete mind control over his sub.

I seems to me that you have just eloquently confirmed the point I was endeavoring, unsuccessfully, to communicate to you.
You propounded, no listed, communication as one of the absolute essentials.
I had endeavoured to convey to you to that the use of nouns, for what are really verbs, makes a disembodied abstraction of them,
open to ambiguity and misunderstanding.----quote from my early thread :-

"e.g communication. Who is communicating what with whom? and are they communicating or only transmitting.
( It has been wisely said that the only measure of a communication is the response)""

cf; joke of the day http://bdsmlibrary.com/forums/showth...9178#post39178

I would however like to suggest that since you wrote “ I list the following as absolute elements..."
and I responded with remarks like “TG I have difficulty with..”,
your accusation that I had dared to preach to you, is I submit inappropriate.
( "the boot being on the other foot" comes to mind) .

The quote from my post about the qualities of successful psychotherapists, that you used to hang on me the accusation of preaching to you ,was,as I clearly stated, not my words but the result of published research.

Your reply to my two posts indicates that you have either misunderstood, or chosen to ignore every 'qualification' that I offered.
This response does of course confirm that by your criteria there is no communication between us, since although I listen you ,
you don't seem to hear me, let alone listen.
But at least WE BOTH AGREE on one thing. There is no point in my making any further response whatsoever to your posts,
since there is no relationship , or communication, between us,
and I am no sycophant;

Unless of course you say something that really provokes me!

You really should lighten up a bit TG. At least try to take on board a little of my signature below, after all

Healthy debate enlivens the mind and enriches the soul!

Donatien

Ps I must however thank you for a new experience. I have never been called 'dude' before, and with a small 'd' too . It really makes me feel a touch american already. And somewhat taller. I shall definitely be strutting today!