Self esteem and self confidence

[John56{vg}]

Honey,

I am a dom and I am 50, soon to be 51. I have had a rich, full life, accomplished many things, been with some very attractive, intelligent, vivacious women, travelled extensively. I have even been a fairly successful actor and comedian and dated an actress from an Academy Award winning film. I have, in the past, lived well, had many friends and socialized extensively.

I have also felt that I was all the things that you feel about yourself. I KNOW that to you all those things are very real. I just hate that you are feeling them, becaue they are a sham, a hateful expression of all the people and incidents that told you you were not enough. Your inner judge renders a verdit and a harsh harsh sentence that sometimes is a death warrant. I know I have attempted suicide a few times. Got so bad I ended up in the hospital for seven days.

The first part of the good news for you is that you have a loving wonderful man in your life that sees through that sham and judge and will tell you about it.

The only thing shameful or wrong or "ugly" about you is that inner voice that is telling you those hateful things about yourself. Sooooo, don't listen to that voice. Listen to your man, your master. He is telling you the truth, You are telling yourself lies.

Second, (and more good news about the beautiful person you are), you posted here. These people at the Library are golden. They are supportive, informative and they have experienced a lot, good and bad, in their lives.

I was a hermit until I found this place. I was lost till I found this place. So become part of our family, talk to subs and doms that have experienced what you have. And I think that will help you.

And last (and maybe most importantly) seek professional help. It was a Godsend to me. I got meds that saved me and talked to therapists that watched over me. So start now and go get help.

We are pulling for you and good luck.

I wanted to add this, I didn't know you were davidnhisgirl till just now. You are the very opposite of ugly hon. You are very beautiful.

John