First I would like to say how much I love each of you for your kind words, your concern and the fact that you all care so much! It means the world to me as do each of you!

Now to explain so that you, my subbie sisters may breathe a sigh of relief and hopefully feel happiness for me and my Master, Sirken. I was told by a dear friend that sirken was interested in another as well a few days ago. She told me this because she was concerned for me, as are all of you. I do not feel she did this to cause problems. But it seems that ltp has some trust issues, (and some of you may remember why). So I immediately tried to contact sirken and when he did not respond to my IM's, I started accusing him. I now feel this was wrong (and not because he convinced me!), but because after talking with a couple of other people and doing some serious thinking (yep...I can be serious on occasion ), it just sorta hit me. I didn't know the friend who told me of this, or the "other" sub any better than I knew him. (yep, I figured out who she was and we had some interesting talks...btw...I like her just fine!) So why did I automatically assume he was at fault? Why?...because I am an insecure sub and not very trusting of men (be they Doms or whatever!). Once I realized all this I thought to myself...you idiot! Have you lost your mind woman???? I mean we seemed to connect from the beginning...just sorta clicked ya know? He is sweet, and kind, and funny, and his words...OMG!!...his words are just so very hot! And he does a fine job of keeping me in line! Well, we finally talked some more after the other stuff happened and we both agreed that maybe we had both rushed a little, but that it just felt right. He told me I could still be his and we would grow with trust, that there is no rush. I gladly and readily accepted! Then yesterday he told me he had posted on site that I am his and will be punished by not being allowed to post any type of reponse for 48 hours. I was not to say anything to anyone that this was my punishment. Well those of you that know me well...may I just say...damn....was this hard for me. He allowed me to read what others had posted so I knew all my subbie sisters were angry, but I was not allowed to defend him in any way! But it hasn't been 48 hours, I hear you all saying! I told ya he is sweet! He knew I was very upset that you guys were bashing him...and I do appreciate your care and concern...honest, but I also felt very badly that I couldn't say anything to anyone so that you all would know that I told him I was willing to accept whatever punishment he saw fit. I also felt it was wrong for everyone to be rude to him for my mistakes, my mistrust and my insecurities. So he has given me permission to post a reply...thank god....cause it was just killing me! Now you know why he did this, and that he is now my Master, which I am very happy about! We will go slowly, and hopefully I WILL learn to please!

Once again I truly appreciate all of you for your love and kindness to me! Now if I may ask you all a favor...he is truly a great Dom...and I have learned from this...so please go easy on him! If not, I may have to pay the price...although that might not be so bad!

I thank you Master for giving me the opportunity to help you set the record straight and to learn!

Hugs and kisses
~ltp