A question of balance.

[Uncle_Ed]

"Ride, ride my see-saw,
Take this place
On this trip
Just for me.

Ride, take a free ride,
Take my place
Have my seat
It's for free.

I worked like a slave for years,
Sweat so hard just to end my fears.
Not to end my life a poor man,
But by now, I know I should have run."

Thank you one of my favourite bands..The "Moody Blues"

I won't ride your see-saw, thank you. That suggests that there is a power struggle going on. I have been there and still wear the scars.

I look upon a relationship as a balance-D/s; f/m; m/f etc etc....

In my humble opinion, based upon numerous relationships in r/l and on-line, a successful one relies upon each partner knowing, acknowledging and relishing their individual role-upper hand; lower hand and so on.
When the balance starts to swing one way or another, I think there is an evil wind blowing. (mixed metaphors there-but, hey! What's a good metaphor?)

Any observations?

[Slade]

Normally I'd say everything is based on trust but that's not necessary true. There are many subs and slaves out there that love absolutely what some people do to them, doesn't matter how humilated or used they are even if the person dominating them doesn't really give a crap one way or another.
It doesn't matter if they know what is going to happen or are asked if they mind, they simply do what they are told and end up loving it because it's so much of who they are at their being.

Balance tends to be when each person enjoys their role and understands what is expected of them, they know what it involves and what may come from it. The balance can be changed when one person starts to act against what the other expects, be it a dom going switch or submissive in part or the sub starts to get more aggressive to the point she's not really being what she was.

Basically going against what each other expected and did all this for to begin with. If your not getting what you wanted thanks to one changing the balance is altered and it begins the problems so many have.

[thrall]

Life is change............

We all change, even if we don't want to or think that we do. Sometimes we change in dramatic ways and sometimes in subtle ways. But we all change. It is human nature to learn and grow.

Regardless of how much everyone would like things to stay the same in a relationship......especially when things all going good........relationships are dynamic...... they move, change and flow.

That my friends is what makes it all so exciting, that is what makes it life.

Learning to experience, learning to adapt, steeping up to the challenge, balancing as you go..............LOL

This is the ride of you life. Think if it as a river, sometimes flowing smoothly, calmly, sometimes moving through white water rapids, sometimes going right over the falls.

Its just life....so live it. Balance is what you make of it. You have to work at it. Both parties involved have to work at it.

Even in a D/s relationship....it all about give and take.......on both sides.

[Rhabbi]

I agree with thrall, life is about balance.

Sometimes 50/50, sometimes 90/10, and sometimes 10/90. But it all works out in the end.