A big thank you to those who written for all the encouragement in keeping this thread alive.

There are many types of relationships to have in this big world of BDSM. Nat and I have a relationship based on friendship, his desire for a sensual domme, and my desire for a submissive male pet. That we truly love each other has made our relationship work. While he's been down this road before, it's my first time having a sub and I couldn't have taken him on as my pet, if I didn't love him.

Yes, I knew Nat for quite some time and he had to prove to me and T that his desires were sincere before I was allowed to take him on.

It's not the same kind of romantic love I have for my husband, nor does it need to be. Often love isn't part of a D/S relationship, but for me it's a requirment for the intimacty, trust and the satisfaction that comes from knowing your partner is having their needs and desires met, while my own are being met as well.

Before the first real-life meeting can be hard on the nerves.

There is the hope and desire to discover if the person you've spoken with for months via telephone,
exchanged photos,
sent and received snail mail packages,
played on the webcam,
and shared very private desires and moments with as an "outercourse lover"
is truly the person you have come to know and cherish.

Pre-meeting, there is an utter terror that maybe this person won't be what you've expected,
that somehow you've been fooling yourself,
that you'll disappoint your partner or your partner will disappoint you,
that hard limits won't be recognized,
that you'll be completely incompatible
or any thing else you worry about.

It's hard to describe the pre-meeting angst,
the doubts that come into even the most self assured minds.

For me, upon meeting Nathaniel, it was a relief and joy to find my fears unfounded. That we could hang out as friends first, outercourse lovers and playmates second, because that's the type of relationship we had built. It is the relationship we both continue to want.

That Nathaniel and I set ourselves up for success long before our first meeting, was critical to our wonderful visit.

I know my sweet pet wants to kiss and tell, to share our adventures and the delightful torments I chose to truly make him mine. Yet T and I have forbidden him to do so. Just as Nat's true identity is to remain hidden, so our private pleasures will continue to be ours alone.

I will encourage Nat to continue writing our fantasy story.
To tell of delights he wishes would happen or perhaps things that did. Only the three of us will know for sure.

Anyone who reads our adventures in the New Lord Mobius's Dungeon knows that "virtual Ruby" is quite the slut. However, in real life, I practice serial monogamy with my husband, T. It's a hard limit that works for Nat, T and me.

IMO: It gets back to the whole, my kink may not be yours, but I respect your right to have whatever and varied kinks your heart desires. If it harms none in a consensual relationship, then do what makes you and your partner(s) happy.

--- Side Note ---

What is outercourse?

Outercourse is sexual activity that does not involve penetration .... click link below to find out more.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Outercourse