One of the great challenges in D/s relationships is the tendency to over psychoanalyze each other's motivations. Well, that's true in any relationship, but D/s seems to bring out the "inner shrink" in each of us and we "think" and "think" why me, why this, why now, etc. Why is that? Why not simply enjoy the pleasures we mutually share and be satisfied with our portion of ecstasy and joy?

Sure, it may be difficult to break the habits of guilt, of insecurity, of trying to talk ourselves out of pleasure by concentrating on all the "what ifs" -- but at some point it goes too far beyond mere self preservation and hovers into obsession, doesn't it? One of the keys it to have or develop other interests either shared or even "outside" the relationship. Find a hobby, enjoy leisure, take an adult class, or do anything that will keep you from simply "vegging out" because that's when the mind has too much time on its hands and we all know where that leads. Not only do outside interests make you a more interesting person and provide for "growth" but it can help prevent the clingy, needy "sub personality" that places too much pressure on a Dom/Domme to provide your "life" for you.

Just some thoughts to ponder, don't you think?

best wishes
GreyJack