And my family dynamic was almost opposite. My father left when I was 2, had very little future contact with him. My mom was a single parent doing the best she could to raise my brother and I in a VERY small town and yet in many ways she was still a "Leave it to Beaver" type of mom, always involved, etc. My grandparents lived close (normally across the street... lol) but my grandmother was ALWAYS the one forced into may decisions because my grandfather didn't want too, etc. (Yep, I married my grandfather in some ways... lol.)
But, the one thing, even as strong and independent both of them said continually was "It would be nice to have someone to take care of me and make the decisions."
Then I saw it as... "you have to be a strong independent woman to survive because the opposite sex (or anyone) can't really be counted on to do it for you." Looking back now though I see that they both were caught, in the same circumstances that my "independent woman" thinking has lead me to be caught in. They both wanted to submit in many ways and yet, based on circumstances and life choices, couldn't.
So, understanding that, I know have to decide which is the best option (or combination of the two) that is right for me. And, in talking to them about it (although somewhat indirectly) neither of them understand why I would "let" someone have that much control while at the same time both agree that it would free me greatly to have someone capable (trusting?) to give that too.
ACK... just realized how off topic I wondered...sorry!