Thank you! Will I go on? Maybe. The fantasy has certainly gone on. Just about every taboo thing you can imagine is in it now. Yet random taboo images do not a good story make, stroke fantasy perhaps yes but not a story.

Yes, for me, if it's not "taboo and wrong" chances are it's not hot for me to imagine. If I've done it in RL, it's unlikely to hit my fantasies.

Exceptions to the rule so far include spanking, ass fucking, throat fucking and of course regular fucking.

The guy I was writing the SRP with was the sort that assumed you want all your fantasies to happen in RL. I find many men think that way and it's absolutely not true of all fantasies, at least not for me.

However, having said that, under perfect conditions with a real Dom who I trusted and who I felt cared about me? I do feel very little would be taboo. So would I do this? Perhaps. I have to be real and state that for the record.

In Gwen's story, the other party wanted me to be as real and as me in RL as I could. Yet he didn't like who that was and it was never enough for him. He felt I was holding out on him in some way. I became very frustrated because I could please him now and then but not consistently. Also he often didn't find my writing erotic and to be honest I often didn't find his to be either. I found him to be rather clinical about it.

I have a need to please. I couldn't do so with him. It saddened me and ate at me.

I'm not sure what you mean by non consent in Gwen's story. Could you clarify?

I agree it is good to explore this. Finding out where it comes from if it can truly be done at all still doesn't help you deal with it really. I have learned a very great deal about myself and D/s, even sex in general from RP.

Thank you for your encouragement about counseling. *kiss* I appreciate it.

Fury