Quote Originally Posted by Playfulsub View Post
In addition to all the obvious items mentioned above (grammar, plot, character development), I want to see some poetic metaphors. And, as much as I like the words cunt and cock, I do like to see some creative descriptions of anatomical parts. I also think erotic is more arousing when written in the 1st person.

I've had some success at jarring the reader using 2nd person... as if I'm talking directly to you.

"He bound you to the sawhorse and selected the whip he would use on you first."

Or 1st person talking about 2nd person instead of 3rd person.

The difference between:

"I stroked her silky-soft thigh." and "I stroked your silky-soft thigh."