Sometimes I wouldn’t know how close he felt himself to be. He would take my hands then stopping me. He would kiss my hands. He would point out little things to me about how to touch him better or recognize when to stop on my own. I learned a lot from him that night. I learned things about cocks that I didn’t want to ever have to use again unless it was with him. Each time his cock deflated I felt sad. I knew it was what he wanted but I didn’t understand why at all. I began to feel like a failure in my efforts. I began to wonder if he would ever come. My hands were really getting tired now. He spoke to me suddenly.

“Is it getting difficult? Do your hands hurt?” He asked.

I shrugged but did not stop. His eyes opened, and again, his eyes stabbed me. I felt nervous. I wondered if he was unhappy with my answer. It’s hadn’t been in words so maybe he didn’t like that. Or he could just be unhappy with me in general. I felt a coldness slide down my spine.

“I just want you to be happy.” I whispered quickly.

“What you are doing tonight is what I like, but every man is different” He told me.

I closed my eyes at his words. I didn’t want to hear about any other men but he continued. His words were like a knife in my heart.

“When you go back to the others you will learn to do this quickly and efficiently. Rarely will you do it the way any individual man wants you too. What you learn with me may, or may not, help you there. I like it to take a long time as I told you, but you won’t really be working for the man you are touching there. You will be working to make money so the sooner you finish the quicker you can move on to another.” He continued.

My jaw clinched. I ground my teeth. I didn’t want to think I would ever go back there. He had to know that. Why would he bring it up now? Was he just being cruel? Hadn’t he said if I was good I could stay? I had so many questions but I didn’t trust myself to ask them nicely.

It was an effort to continue to stroke his cock the way he wanted and not go at it too hard. My fingers twitched with menace because of what he had just said. I was hurt to the core by his words.

My hands began to cramp painfully. I promised myself I wouldn’t cry. I had tried to please him now for a long while. I wanted to make him feel wonderful returning what he had given me but now I was hurting, and not just physically. I felt like I was running out of time here. I worried that the muscles in my hands would seize up. I didn’t want that. I couldn’t give him pleasure if it did.

“I want to you take one hand and stroke the flesh between my testicles and ass.” He ordered me.

I flinched at his words this time. They seemed too raw to me. I felt like a whore for the first time with him. I felt my bottom clench, I couldn’t figure out if it was doing so in shock, disgust or excitement. I did as he asked, all the while my hands felt worse and worse.

“Do you want to make me come?” He asked.

“Yes!” I cried instantly without thinking.

He chuckled.

“Why?” He questioned.

“You made me come. Now I want to do for you.” I answered.

“Do you think my hands hurt when I pleased you?” He growled suddenly. I felt horrible when he said that.

“Do you think I was angry, hurt or scared?” He asked. His voice was slightly harsh; it was demanding and he sounded so disappointed in me. I shrank inside as the meaning of his words slid into me. I was in error again. I was ruining everything for him.

“No.” I said shaking my head. I opened my eyes so I could try to see where this was all going. I felt confused and ashamed.

“Do you think I’ve been too hard on you?” He asked.

“No! I, I, don’t know, much.” I said lowering my eyes. I did think he was being too hard on me, in a way. I also felt like a failure. I was so ignorant about things like this. I felt so small.

“You know do much. You know your heart. You just have to let it answer. You have to listen to it.” He insisted.

A tear slipped out of my eye and then another. More followed until my eyes were like a facet turn on low.

“Please let me make you happy, let me give you pleasure.” I pleaded with him.

He nodded. He was hard now in my left hand. My right was lower where he had asked me to rub. I moved my left hand against his sweet spot and felt him jump.

I smiled through the tears that were gathering in my eyes making my vision gray and sort of wispy around the edges. I bit my lip. His eyes were again boring into me.

My hand moved faster up and down his shaft. I made sure to always hit his sweet spot over and over as I worked his flesh. His cock was twitching and jumping. Little clear beads of fluid were starting to come out of the top of it. I was getting excited at all of this. It made me feel happy to think I was able to bring him pleasure. I don’t know how much time it took. I sort of lost my concept of time. Nothing mattered to me but this. I didn’t feel the pain anymore in my hands.

“Tell me what you want.” He demanded after a while.

“I want you to come, please.” I begged moving faster on him. All other thoughts and feelings where gone now. Only this was important to me.

His mouth’s smile deepened. His breathing now was more like a long distance runner might sound, as he was nearing the end of a marathon.

“Why?” He gasped looking into my eyes. I looked back into his. The look in his eyes touched me so much. Before I could stop myself, I spoke my heart.

“Because I love you.” I blurted it out like a perfect idiot. I closed my eyes and turned red, feeling more tears fall.

His cock jerked in my hand. I looked down just in time to see his stream shoot out of that little hole in the top of his cock. My mouth opened in amazement. My eyes probably looked huge as I watched him spurt and jerk over and over. It made me so happy. I was almost afraid the burst of joy I felt was so potent it was frightening.

My error had pleased him. Those words I thought, they had put him over the edge, but why? Were they even true? I searched inside myself.

He moaned and pulled me to him. Kissing my face while his cock continued to jerk and spurt. He growled a little holding me close to him. Later he asked me if I meant it.

I knew then my words had made the difference. They were as important to him as I had hoped. I couldn’t explain why I said those three little words but I felt they were solid and true. I told him so.

His face beamed at me. He covered me in kisses. He massaged my hands until the pain that had started up again, and stiffened them, was gone.

“My sweet girl” He murmured over and over as he kissed me. All the anger, fear, embarrassment and everything else, faded again then. The more positive emotions of pride, relief, love and the warmth of security covered the negative ones up.

“You made me very happy tonight.” He told me.

My heart felt like it flew wide open when he said that. I was so thrilled. He was everything to me in those moments, absolutely everything.