There has been a great deal of loving care shown both by me when I am Domme and to me when I sub. I've found that respect is a necessary component of any D/s relationship (especially with regard to limits) and IMHO that tends to manifest itself in courteous behavior outside of the kink.

I think your roommate may believe that Dom equates with abuser. You can either try and educate her or just remain secure in the knowledge that your nature and the treatment of your subs does not preclude you from being a Dom.