This may become a hot topic... we have a real difference of opinion, at least as to how to start. LOL

I agree with H. You should have her masterbate for you. A lot. But I suggest you demand that she come as fast as she can. When she does, praise and reward her as you would any pet for obeying. Make sure you begin that praise while she is in the midst of her orgasm and that you include your "command phrase."

Later, you can begin to exert control with denial. Then the association previously established between the orgasm and the command phrase will be all the more powerful.