Actually...I've been wondering the same thing, but was too shy to ask. So double thanks for posting this.

I also always knew, way before there was a name for it. I, too, have an abusive background -- albeit not sexual, and not excessively physical. When I broke the cycle...or at least finally began to stand on my feet, this really bothered me for a while. Firstly, there is this cliché that submissive women are submissive due to some abuse-trauma, which I personally find somewhat ridiculous...and I certainly didn't want to be part of this cliché. And secondly, it somehow shattered everything I thought to be true about myself. Being submissive and being abused are two entirely different things, though. It's hard to explain, but it feels completely different. One is healthy and one is destructive. Argh, I'm not good at that.

That aside, I think it contributed to the way I'm wired. If you live a major part of your life learning that you are never good enough (and never can be) and are forced to play a game where you can't win and where the rules are constantly changing...well, it's awesome to be able to please somebody entirely, to be appreciated and valued, and to play by rules that do not only apply to both parties, but which are also kept and respected.

Just my thoughts on the topic. I'll follow this thread with curiosity, with hopes for some more insight.