Thank you everyone for all the great responses.

I have been to one munch....the one that is meets closest to where I live. It was entirely made of older overweight people. Now, before anyone slams me...let me say that I don't think people who are overweight are "bad" or less deserving. Actually, I happen to be lucky to have good metabolism...because my eating habits are terrible! Anyway, I'm just not usually attracted to people who are overweight. I also thought it was strange that everyone there was so alike. In any case, I did stay the one night I went, and I had some good conversation. So I was glad I went.

I am not into public play and - I forget who said it - but someone did mention something about people who were at munches being more public about it...or something along those lines. I have kind of conflicting reactions to people who bring the lifestyle out into the public sphere...I think it is very cool that people are evolved enough to accept it in themselves and to be who they are...on the otherhand, it's just not as sexy to me out in the open! It almost seems kind of clinical.

I have been a few times to a bdsm club here in Chicago and I met some very interesting, good people.

My problem with meeting people online has been that so many people are not who they say they are. Also, probably more than that, there are a lot of guys who claim to be into the lifestyle, but who are just looking for some easy, kinky sex. And they're often the same ones who talk about how all the other guys are the ones out there looking for easy, kinky sex!

Anyway, thank you to everyone for your thoughtful responses.

Cheers!