Originally Posted by playme
Is that rape or was this consentual? From what you wrote it sounds like rape...if I'm wrong..sorry. A little more detail might be needed to clarify.
Originally Posted by playme
Is that rape or was this consentual? From what you wrote it sounds like rape...if I'm wrong..sorry. A little more detail might be needed to clarify.
I guess it's a case of a mix of things - I was 14, dumb and naive, got myself tricked into a jamb I didn't Iunderstand WAS a jamb that after I got myself into it I wasn't able to get myself out of it.... outsmarted, overpowered, ouwitted, tricked, manipulated, intimidated, ... the one guy was married and I use to watch his kids and the other guy was a friend of his. He was driving me home after I'd watched the kids, asked if I'd mind if he stopped and picked up his friend before taking me home....yada yada ya one thing led to the next and well the rest as they say is ancient history now.Originally Posted by submissivewife
They had no business doing what they did but in the same breath I had no business getting myself into that situation to begin with.
As young as I was I got mself led to believe it was no more fault of any one of them or me and babysitting was my only source of cash so didn't dare do anything that might lose me that income so it all got sort of twisted into how my mind got set to be the way it works now.
And thats the long and short of that.
I have to agree with submissivewife (except at 14 it probably wouldn't be considered consensual) it still has the appearance of rape. Rape by any other name is still rape.
WB
when i was 16, with my boyfriend at the time...we used to bet sexual slaveries on all kinds of things, hockey game outcomes, card games etc and where i could control it, i'd always make sure to lose and then spend the rest of the week doing whatever he wanted. of course, with both of us still at home with our parents, there were some issues there but we spent plenty of time out playing!
In the technical, legal and socialy acceptable sense of the reality of it coupled with hindsight and with experience of age & its' given wisdom yes NOW I can see it for what it was and yes, rape is rape - I'm not giving an ok to any form of rape - it simply isn't what my understanding was back then. Of course I understand it now and can see it for the crime it was & therefore now I can say for a fact yes I was raped ok so so --- if it had happened today I'd see it differently and I'd not feel one bit of responsibility about it and I'd call the police and prosecute the scum for doing that to me - yes - that's what I would do NOW,... it didn't happen now it happened when I didn't have the fcilities to reason it out and rationalize it thru that way...Originally Posted by Warbaby1943
My thoughts and how it all got instilled into my thought process and how I made it seem ok and how I coped thru it all became my reality which then became my acceptance to what right and wrong and sex was supose to be. The guys took and I had to let em do what they wanted and that was how it worked.
I feel into that mindset and got comfy in it and all subsequent partners carried on in that fashion and when it is normal to you you don't know to think otherwise. There is no comparison to know diferently.
Before anyone gets up in arms - let me clarify by saying tha I now understand the difference between knowing what is what and participating as a willing participant as opposed to not having any idea I even had a say in the matter let alone having a right to have my own say.
The awakining was a HUGE turning point and one that has made me appreciate myself and give me such delight in my own choice to surrender per say. In essence I now know what the heck it is that being a submissive is all about. It's not a batle of demands taken at will from another person who doesn't have a choice or say in the matter. NO that's abuse and the so called sub is being abused and the so called dom is a habitual abuser...
For me now, my reality of what domination and submission is is an intriquate involvment of parties who have utmost respect and can give impliciate trust in one another and that is the truly defined meaning which now i can say defines the actual beauty and thrill and excitement and exctacy and pleasures and intensity and bottom line guts and substance to my choice to be a submissive partner.
I feel very strongly that it is what has happened to us over course of time that gives us the substance to be the person we are now today. And to quote some oe I don't know who said it but "The lessons in life are given only to those who choose to learn by lifes lessons". or something like that - anyway ...
that's that ok? ok then moving on and off to browse around
my first experience was a flogging for my birthday...30 strokes
Back when I was in the service I think it all came to a head so
to speak.
There was a Lieutenant JG that was getting divorced and
dropping subtle hints about what she liked sexually.
She had a Christmas party at her house and as it turned
out the only people invited were myself and one other
couple much to my surprise and that's being straight up.
As the evening drew on we ended up in her bedroom
while the other couple was occupied elsewhere.
For some odd reason I was somewhat angry about
being deceived as to the invitation to a party that was
in reality NOT that at all.
Knowing a little of what she enjoyed from previous
conversations I ended up tying her hands behind her back
and her legs apart.
I used some of her nylon stockings to do the tying as she
was a stocking and garter belt type of lady rather than
opting for pantyhose.
She was wearing a pair of French cut style panties that I'd
left on her and stuffed a tennis ball down the front of them
to jam it tight against her clit. Found those in the closet with
her tennis gear and thought they looked interesting.
I took another nylon and cinched the panties up real tight
by pulling them up her ass crack and tying off the excess
material. Everytime she struggled that ball would roll over
her clit and make her squirm even more. I found over time
that those little rubber super balls are much better to use
for this.
I start talking dirty to her, calling her filthy names and telling
her what I was going to do to her. I found a pair of her
worn panties laying on top of the hamper and used those to
stuff in her mouth as a gag and another nylon to hold them in
place. Yes, I did spend a little time getting her scent off them,
no need to say I didn't and pretend I'm not just that way.
Once she was all snug and secure I took off my clothes
and began to masturbate in front of her. Just seeing her like
that triggered something in me that never left me. Whether
that's good or bad I imagine remains to be seen but it's a
part of me now so I just accept that.
As I masturbated I kept yelling at her, telling her to watch.
Everytime she turned her head I grabbed her jaw
and smacked her in the face with my cock. As I continued
to do that I used my free hand to start pulling her nipples,
twisting on them. I know she came off from that because
she moaned like hell and those eyes rolled up showing the
whites just like shark does when it's feeding on prey.
I kept telling her how much she liked what was happening,
how dirty she was for enjoying it and saying those things
made it all the more exciting for me. It wasn't all that
long after that I had to cum too and I did.
Right in her face, I got up close and let it fly and shot
my load over her mouth and everywhere I could spray it.
In some way I think I was marking her as mine when I
got to thinking about it later on.
I saw she was sobbing when I became more conscious of
what had happened and I was scared shitless. I thought
this was it, I'd really fucked up BIG time now. I started
untying her and apologizing like hell for what I'd done
and as soon as she got free she grabbed me and kissed
me like mad. That was the first time I'd ever tasted
my own cum and I was aroused beyond measure
because it came from sharing with a woman I'd been with.
I know I've gone on way too long with this but it's somethng
that I've never forgotten and I believe this was a turning
point for me.
Anyway we ended up having sex most of that night and
continued a relationship for a long time after till she
was transferred to England. During the time we spent
together we'd experimented in many different ways
with BDSM. We pushed our own limits and enjoyed things
(that at the time) we probably weren't aware there were
terms or names to describe what we did.
Over the years I'd wondered if there was something wrong
with me, if I was a bad person because of what I enjoyed.
After a long while I just came to accept things as they
were and found I wasn't alone in my thoughts about things
like this.
I realized that I am who I am and I wouldn't change a
single thing even if it were possible to do so.
I accept others as they are, no bullshit between us, just
being ourselves and getting to know them through all
the aspects if they are willing to share that way with me.
Pretty much in a nutshell that's just how I roll with things.
Master Jeff-aka Professor Feather
It's made up of lonely moments
There was always a moment there when I knew
You always gave instalments
Always knew u concentrated and grew
And I believe in reinvention
Do you believe that life is holding the clue
Take away all the lonely moments
Give me full communication with you
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"The healthy man does not torture others - generally it is the tortured who turn into torturers."
Loved reading this, Scorpio. Thanks for sharing. Again.
I remember it being fucked in the bathroom of a cafe and not entirely willingly. He told me that he would show me the secrets of bdsm so I listened and willingly followed him. He guided me to the bathroom and cuffed me to the toilet in one of the stalls and told me not to scream. I was so frightened that I couldn't say anything anyway. He then proceded to have rough sex with me. When he finished he asked if I enjoyed it. I didn't respond so he took me home. I guess I was in a trance because when he told me to wait for him in the bathroom I did. That's how the relationship started I guess.
Oh man, Misato - what a hot scene!! Did you enjoy it at the time? Thank you for sharing something so intimate.![]()
Will sub for hugs!
- If you wish to travel far and fast, travel light.
Take off all your envies, jealousies, unforgiveness, selfishness and fears. -
Glenn Clark
was when my Mistress asked me to show Her my breasts and to masterbate with my vibrator. Pretty tame, but for me it was a really big step. Believe it or not i am very shy(lol) and very insecure, so i think Mistress may have been starting me out slowly. Probably a little test lol!
So, that's the first submissive thing i did for Her.
i would have to say that the most intimate and intense moments that have been shared between us would be when She asks me to look at Her (looking right into the webcam) for me that is very intimate.
i have a bit of a problem with eye contact, so when She asks me to look at Her in the eye, it's a very powerful and intense feeling for me! Especially since She can see me but i can't see Her.
i can't even begin to imagine the feelings that i'll experience when i see Her in August, *claps hands with excitement*, can't wait!!! lol!
frankee
Proud sub of Mistress Cindy![]()
I must admit that I did enjoy it. It was painful but it was also a thrill. The sensations were amazing and I did somewhat enjoy the control that he held over me. I'm glad that you enjoyed my post.Originally Posted by Silke
Thank you for adding this, Misato...to me that's the difference between abuse/rape and a kinky scene. And since this is not fantasy but r/l, I'm glad that you enjoyed the experience - it makes re-reading your post even more exciting for me.![]()
Will sub for hugs!
- If you wish to travel far and fast, travel light.
Take off all your envies, jealousies, unforgiveness, selfishness and fears. -
Glenn Clark
Hi
My first taste of submission had nothing to do with sex and everything to do with J's need to control.
I had just turned 16 when we met on holiday in Spain.
We had vanilla sex the night we met. He was nearly twice my age but we did not realise it.
The next day he met me at my hotel to take me out for lunch. My folks had gone on a trip.
We met in the lobby, he insisted I change my clothes. He picked what he wanted me to wear right down to the lack of underwear. We went to a posh restaurant - I thought anywhere which didn't sell burgers was posh then. He order food for me and a soft drink. He had not realised my age the night before and now refused to buy me alchol.
He talked to me, asked questions and listened to the replies. He insisted on honesty. I found I could not lie or even exagerate.
He decided when it was time to leave, all I wanted was to get him back to bed, I had never had sex like it, the boys I had been with did not know half as much about how to give a girl a good time as he did.
He decided that we could not have sex (intercourse) until I was older, but that he wanted to get to know me better.
He made me make promises. Not to have sex with anyone else. To talk to him every day. To visit at least once a month. To obey his wishes.
When we returned to the hotel, he played with me a liitle, when I tried to touch him, without his permission, he turned me over on his lap and spanked me. I loved it, he loved it and I knew I was his.
We could not be together full time until I was nearly 19, but my 18th birthday was a real blinder.
We have been together nearly 30 years and he can still control me with just a word.
b
Oooh, what a wonderful story, brina!! Thank you for sharing it andto the forums. Hope you'll find this a great place to hang out and meet friends.
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Will sub for hugs!
- If you wish to travel far and fast, travel light.
Take off all your envies, jealousies, unforgiveness, selfishness and fears. -
Glenn Clark
the first thing i did as a submissive was at 14 when my boufriend (who was 16) took me out in his truck and tired me naked in the rear as he drove through town/
hmm after playing being tied in bikini to a tree (or three?) by a female friend of my parents. She stroked me everywhere, i don't know if was the bondage to the three or Her hands stroking me...i thought i go crazy of excitment and hornyness..
kiss,
slavegirl gretha {Mr H. & Mrs A.}
My first submissive act was non-sexual. It was around the time of my graduation, I was full of confidence, and still held by my principle of 'no man is going to boss me'.
It was at a summer ball, and this man who I only vaguely knew LEAD me in dance after dance. As in he REALLY lead me, his eyes and hands told me unquestioningly exactly where he wanted me, and how he wanted me to move. And for the first time I submissively obeyed.
What happened next.......well that is a story the two of us are still writing.
My first submissive act was when my husband and I had been dating for awhile, and were newly intimate with each other.
We were in his bed, with him reclined against the headboard and me lying against his chest. He would carress my body in various ways and locations, and ask me if I enjoyed what he was doing, to which I (of course!) would respond "yes" or give an approving "mmm".
He then reached for my hand, which was resting on his thigh, gently picked it up, and placed my fingertips over my clit. With his hand resting on mine, he slowly began forming slow circles.
He kissed my ear, whispering, "Does that feel good?" I rested my head back on his shoulder, saying it did. Then, he took his hand from mine and told me he wanted me to make myself cum for him.
I was a little uneasy with this, as I had never masterbated with someone watching before. I was already stimulated from our foreplay though, so the surprise of his request had pushed my excitement even further.
Knowing that he was watching and feeling my body respond to self stimulation brought me to one of the best orgasms I had ever given myself.
Since then, we have had many pleasurable new experiences together.
A very nice 'first' pixie_dust![]()
The first thing that I did as a sub was make my own collar and leash, I didn't have much to work with so I used a choker necklace that I have and attached necklace chains to it.
I too, as some of you, now realise that my first submissive act was during play as a child.
I always wanted to be the one tied up and held prisoner, or the one to be sacrificed to the sun god.
Now it's the wish to be the witch being tortured to confess her wanton ways! or the innocent (now that has to be a joke!) being questioned by the Spanish Inquisition.
Nicelips692
I am what I am, and I like me, the way I am!
I had applied for a jog as a housekeper and the man told me to take my clothes off - right in front of him. I did, and got the job. I've been his sub ever since (8 years now).
Vanessa
There's just nothing like the first time someone bends you over the furniture and gives you a good hard spanking.
That was the first one, and there have been many more since.
Thats just so beautiful. Im all soppy nowOriginally Posted by cariad(CC)
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And being led in dance, as to where there is no doubt where you will be next, its a marvelous experience. Good man!
my first submissive sexual act was in the basement of a car park.
This guy (Master) made me pull down my trousers showing him myself in my underpants. He had me pull my pants up tight and then he had me pull them down.
All the time he was masturbating.
He told me to rub my willy and then he rubbed it too. i think i stayed soft.
Then he came and he gave me five pounds..
When i was a fresh fourteen with my first boyfriend (who also took my virginity)......we were arguing intensely over something and he threatened to hit me. i dared him, teased him, goaded him until he finally slapped me open handed across the face. i still remember the intense rush, straight adrenaline to my.....well private areas.....and i then knelt in front of him, hugged his legs, apologetically.
and yeah the sex was awesome after that![]()
For me it was a female cousin telling me to walk around naked, play with myself and other wonderful humiliating actions. I would love to find someone to take control of me again.
When I was about 8 we were visitng some family friends, a boy put his toy handcuffs on me with my arms behind my back when we were playing I screamed for him to stop and he did. I can still remember how intoxicating the feeling of being bound was.
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