A few questions concerning punishment

[DowntownAmber]

What I meant was when silence and ignoring is used not to teach a lesson but simply to get back and be mean to another person.

Yes, I would say that goeas for ANY type of punishment, whether it be something physical or a mental lesson learned. Every Dom worth his salt I have ever spoken with on this topic has agreed that enacting a punishment while angry is a VERY BAD IDEA. Anger and vindictiveness are what turn a safe, sane, and consensual Lifestyle into abuse. Again, this can be applied to both physical and to headspace discipline.

Hope I cleared things up!

[AdrianaAurora]

Yes, I would say that goeas for ANY type of punishment, whether it be something physical or a mental lesson learned. Every Dom worth his salt I have ever spoken with on this topic has agreed that enacting a punishment while angry is a VERY BAD IDEA. Anger and vindictiveness are what turn a safe, sane, and consensual Lifestyle into abuse. Again, this can be applied to both physical and to headspace discipline.

Hope I cleared things up!

When bdsm punishment becomes an excuse for a dom to express his anger it becomes abuse. If he is truly angry he waits until he has calmed down to deal with an issue.

So basically we agree that we agree, lol. We all perceive things differently and I was just saying that for me that particular form of vindictiveness is especially intolerable.

[Ozme52]

I don't think I've ever expressed anger with a sub...

The best I can do is disappointment...

[HisKitty]

Dissappointment is the worst there's nothing I hate more than dissappointing Master.

[DowntownAmber]

I don't think I've ever expressed anger with a sub...

The best I can do is disappointment...

Disappointment is worse than anger any day - anger I want to fight against and disregard, disappointment will go right to my core and nothing will make me try harder to be better.

[slaveaislinn]

i just wanted to thank you all for your posts it was a very interesting read for a newer slave. Thanks

[.x.Cole.x.]

wow i have learned that everyones opinions somehow interlude into the next. and i love reading them because i learn a llot of different things but punishment wise... everyone has it down... its all subjective. i have never had to use our safeword in the entirety of our relationship. which in a way makes me happy becasue he doesnt push me ya know.. but sometimes now that im thinking about it i kinda like being pushed to my limit if you will.. i dunno.

[Ozme52]

Absolutely cole

He shouldn't "test" you to see if he can make you say it... but certainly he should push your comfort zone a bit... and can do so if you've assured him you would use it if necessary.

It's always better, imo, around the edges. Keeps things spicey.