Quote Originally Posted by Kansas Badman View Post
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Think about it … he has to decide when to set things up for playtime; he has to arrange to have all the toys present; he has to plan or at least improvise the what’s going to happen; he has to stay in role during the entire session and there’s more. It’s an intense and demanding task, being a dominant. He has to create the entire scenario and then play it out for the submissive every time. Compare that to what the submissive has to do.

The submissive has only to give up control of her body a nd allow her mind to become one with the moment.She doesn’t have to actually do anything!
How about changing sides ;-)
(Only joking)

He really can’t abandon himself completely as the submissive does. By definition, he has to dominate his own emotions even more than he does the submissive’s. He has to remain in control.
This is true, and something I personally sometimes find frustrating.
How do you manage?

It gets to be more work than thrill, more trouble than it’s worth.

Don’t blame your husband for fading on you here. Most do, especially in a marriage situation. Marriage combined with BDSM is like expecting the magician’s helper to always be thrilled and amazed by the master’s illusions while at the same time expecting the master to come up with new tricks every night. That’s a difficult thing to keep going over the life of a marriage. This may be why the majority of both doms and subs are single: they need to be free to move on when the thrill fades.
I don't actually recognize this statistic here. I think there are more committed relationships BDSM/Ds or whatever than single. This because yes you do have to work at it, but when done, you reap the rewards.