I don't know whether it's my age, the heart medication or whether I've got my head straight at last, but my 'needs' seem to have become less important.

Many years ago I was dying to do things, many of which I've done. The only fantasy I really haven't lived looks like happening now.

It just seems like a lovely thing to do, something I desire to do much more than 'need' to do.

I'll enjoy touching her cheek as her arms are bound behind her back & looking in her eyes. I may love the thought of (oops better not give too much away) but it's something I desire to do, I won't die without it.

I remember the first time I took my wife out, before we were married. She was still a teenager- same age as you Mina. She was the most sexy thing I'd ever seen in real life & she was next to me in my car in the dark.

Even then I didn't feel a need for her, we exchanged a bit of passion (long after the movie finished I might add) but it was just nice. It felt fantastic, but I was happy to leave it at the kissy fondly stage & wait for the pants off thing til it was time.

Anticipation can be very pleasant- the next 6 months will be nice.

Tojo