Thanks so much, Lil. I really appreciate your words. I want to clarify that I wasn't looking for a one-off with either guy, I was looking for an ongoing play relationship. I did for sure meet them first, phone, email, TM etc. In fact that's part of the problem - you can develop such a false intimacy with all the virtual contact and then being together in person can be very different, even though as I said we did do the meet and greet first. I knew the first one for about a month, in a weird way, before any sex. The second not so long, I will admit, but he's less, hmm, emotionally dangerous.