Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
Trust and communication are key to a healthy BDSM playdate
How can trust be established when placing a Craigslist ad for a playdate with a stranger. If time is spent really getting to know the guy beforehand then possibly a degree of trust can be established but if not then there is always a risk. One could look at it that you could trust this guy, he told you what he was like and hoisted a red flag for you. Had he said he always respected limits then at the playdate shown his true colors that would have been far worse!
Quite true on that last bit. At least he gave me the opportunity to know that he was (in my eyes) a jerk before I wasted any time on him.

The inevitable consequence of placing a woman-seeking-man ad is getting a lot of responses. Typically (for me) only a few responses will be engaging, well-written, focused on reality (i.e. discussing turn-ons rather than telling an erotic story), and generally sincere (taking the time to tell a bit about themselves, asking about me, and so on). I will email them back in hopes of generating an email exchange that's more of the same, and to confirm that their expectations are sufficiently close to my own. Then we meet - for coffee, in public. We talk about the finer points of play expectations, confirm compatibility, and generally give ourselves a chance to make sure that there aren't any spidey senses a-tingle. Only then would I consent to any sort of play.

Is it risky? Yes. I view it as no riskier than meeting people in a real-life setting, just with the added busywork of sorting and writing/replying to emails. People in real life can creep you out or misrepresent themselves too. Online, you can weed out the folks you don't want near you without them knowing your name or your face... and in that very limited sense, making the initial contact via Craigslist is actually more comfortable, because I can keep *myself* anonymous at my discretion.