Quote Originally Posted by sadiej View Post
That is a question that I have poneder for a long time. I found that I asked it of myself more when I was denying my true nature as that of a submissive. The more I fought the yearing and desire to reliquish control, the more out balance I feel.

I seek submission, to be free. Every other area of my life, I am in control.. always in charge. Giving that power and placing myself in the hands of my Master gives me the opportunity to let go that I would experience otherwise.

It is a thrill and a terror. The rush of feeling his power over mine. His will instead of my own.

I have found the answer to this question does not rest in my "logical mind"... it is answered with my submissive soul.
sadie said it exactly as I feel
I want to release all control of myself
To explore my fantasy knowing someone else is doing it for me

As you know my hubby has no interest in BDSM so I have been serving a Master online
His commands are something I would not have done except I find the results are SO fulfilling, as he said I "have a glow afterwards" and he is right
So I overcome my fears and trepidations and surrender myself to the command
Isn't it what we all do?