I belong to another (non-kink related) forum that is (also) exceedingly respectful, friendly and intelligent. A lot of posters here have said that part of the reason this place is nice is because of the atmosphere- it's not a singles bar. It's informative and supportive and fun, and that tends to drive trolls away. I'm at my other forum much more frequently than I am at this one, so I'll offer my opinion about why that one is so good and you can decide if any of it applies here.

The moderators are excellent. I think some of them are assholes and control freaks (in a bad way ), but I also think they moderate the board very efficiently. They built up an atmosphere of respect, by promoting respectfulness. In my 3 years there, I haven't been witness to any favoritism. They create a dialogue when there is a conflict and are very clear about what is and is not acceptable. This makes it sound like the rules are prohibative, but they aren't.

And, as someone said above, nice people draw other nice people. You really do reap what you sow. And who wants to troll a board where nobody rises to the bait, but instead tries to have an intelligent conversation or ignores the comment entirely? No place is perfect, but sometimes it can feel that way. Now I just need to figure out how I got in there, and here...