I understand your and the others frustrations, as it never is easy to find a partner. I can assure you that it isn't exactly easy, probably even more difficult, for a male dom to find a female sub... Even in clubs it's difficult, as there goes 100 males, at least, to each female.
So you just have too keep on looking and see if there are any clubs or events in your area.
You also be be lucky with "vanilla" guys, by being honest with them. I've got some quite good experiences with "vanilla" girls, by letting them know that I'm a dom from the very start. Some do of course leave right away, others might want to give it a try and then some leaves. But some really like it!!! Just look at the posted pics of sub zero