Mending ways?

[TheseDays]

Here is some more background, because I don't believe anyone knows truly what happened.

We got together (for the first time) back in June (or around then). Then I made the mistake of cheating. I know I messed up. I told the other girl it was a mistake, and I fought to keep tommiecat from leaving, but we went our own way. It hurt me so bad to know what I had done, but I still loved tommiecat and I still do.

So then all these months later, a couple of weeks ago I randomly decided to talk to her. We ended up telling each other we were still in love with each other.

So we got back together, all was going well (or so I thought, was never told by her that it was still bothering her). So I figured we had both understood what happened before and got over it.

Then the other day she tells me that she doesn't love me because of what happened and not being able to oversee that (or along those lines).

That hurt me, and I know it hurt her. I am sorry she can't love me because of what happened. I am sorry that I have taken her back and then she goes and tells me this after like 3 or 4 weeks of talking again. I am sorry.

I know I messed up, I understand that. I myself know that it was a mistake, and through it all, all of these months I still love this girl.

I am willing to work through this if I know that she is willing to work through it to.

Thats what it comes down to for me. If she is willing to sit down and tell me that she wants to make this relationship work, or at least try to. Then I will give it a shot.

But I will not allow my self to be played with like a puppet. I will not allow her to tell me that she loves me, all the while she wants to try and make it work and then go and toss me away again because she can't get over what happened.

It was a mistake hun, I am sorry for it. So you need to either decide if you want to work together and try to make this relationship work or not. I am willing, but I need to know you are too.

I love you, I am sorry you are hurt, I am sorry it ended the way it did both the first time and this time.

You left me the other day because of our past, I am working to overcome that, but it is a two way street. We need to both come together and work on it to make it work. It is only going to work out if we both work together and together overcome what happened.

**** I am trying to focus on her needs as well, but I also need to know that I am not being tossed around. If you want to make it work, then lets try. Lets try to make it work. I would like to, maybe you do as well. Ball is in your court now.

I am hurt to from this because we did come back together, only for me to be tossed away because we aren't over what happened. Well I am sorry it happened.

Another Edit: I am wiling to sit down and talk about it, but we HAVE TO talk about it. Which we have never done in the past. If she had brought it up and discussed it and told me it was still bothering her I would have understand. We both never brought it up. I am sorry she couldn't bring it up if it was bothering her until she said goodbye.