If we could all find our ideal other then there would be less problems in the world. I don't think it is possible to find someone with whom you fit completely. There will always be some rough edges to work out and relationships are all about compromise - does what you both gain from a potential relationship balance out what you would lose?

As for events... I am sure he would have no problem with you going to an event as an observer. I think you need to go to at least one to see what they are like rather than being prejudiced by reports of others before you decide your opinion of them. You don't have to take part in any competition based chest beatings if you don't want to - just be the cool kid who takes it easy and doesn't get involved in that 'childish nonsense'

Would a relationship between you work? No idea. It might not. You may end up exploding in a horrible mess of jealous rage. You may decide you are not right for each other and stay good friends. It may be great and end up going the distance. Basically, I do not think there is any way to answer this question other than to say 'suck him and see.'