I think that part of the problem is the very thin line between having limits and preferences vs. a "script". I've had Dommes comment to me on other forums that it is ridiculous for subs to try to set out very specific do's and don'ts; that they're taking the Domme's power.

On the other hand, we all have things that work for us and things that don't. To me (and I mean no offense to anyone whatever their own likes and dislikes) the whole ritualistic Domm(me)/sub "Master/Mistress" interaction along with stereotyped costumes (leather and/or latex) make the whole thing seem something of a game. It seems a bit like dressing up in Star Trek garb and learning to speak Klingonese. And I happen to not be into pain also. This doesn't make these things wrong, but they're not right for me.

To me the greatest area of female power is their sexual power. And I don't think a woman has to wear leather or be called Mistress to exert her power over men. I truly believe that almost all men want to serve women but many are too proud to admit it! I am totally thrilled when a woman uses my sexual excitement to subdue me and makes me totally submit to her.