Trust and Honesty

[Arria]

I am with jeanne regarding the fact that he is not the only man who can be your dom, and a good one at that.

For me, personally, lying stinks. I don´t believe that other woman is his "ex-girlfriend", either. I think it more likely that she will _become_ his ex once he has you for sure.
No, I don´t know either of you. But I have seen that happen a few times r/l to friends.

Look, I am not into the whole "my partner checks all my mails and my phone and therefore I cannot tell you anything" bullshit argumentation.
If she actually IS his ex, which right would she have to go through his correspondence? Zero.
Now if she has zero right to do that, and he does not only let her get away with it, but falls over his own feet trying to hide anything she might dislike... does that sound like a dom? No. It does not even sound like a man. It sounds like a douchebag with no spine.
Do you wish to submit r/l to a douchebag with no spine?

And IF that other girl is prone to hurt herself, she will do so no matter what the reason for him leaving her is.
But I don´t buy that, either.

Call me cynical, but I have learned to develop a healthy mistrust toward people who give oh-so-noble reasons for not being able to tell the truth.

I think he served you a load of bullshit and lies. Yes, it is nice that he spent so much time on you. But there are people out there who have their own reasons for being helpful, not all of them nice.

And much as I hate to say it: The arguments he is using on you for not being allowed to call him at work etc. are all the argumentations married men use on their mistresses, in order to keep them "invisible".

Do what your heart tells you. And let me say it is my opinion that trust and honesty are present from the beginning of a D/S relationship, not starting somewhere halfway through it.

Best wishes and good luck, I hope you find someone who really is worthy of you, your time and your life.