Hm, apparently one cannot quote a part of a quote.
*lol* Ozme, youīre impossible!
As for this text:
"As for the power within the relationship: I found, as I learned over time, to ask for his opinion on things, simply because there are a lot of things he knows more about than I do, and because he is usually right (yay, I admitted it! *lol*)." by me and
"But I'll bet he considers all of your input in the decisions he makes too. Such does not diminish power." by Ozme -
Well, basically, yes.
Though it does not happen often that this becomes necessary. He usually can handle his own stuff, and we let each other make the daily life decisions on our own.
As for bigger issues like large amounts being spent - e.g. for the car, or for a vacation -, we decide and discuss together, until all parties involved are happy with the compromise.
This is what works best for us.
I know there are people who are into micromanagement etc., but neither of us wants that.
I donīt want to give over control over every little step I take, and he would not want to be bothered with a woman who does not want to make any decision alone.
I basically donīt want to be parented or controlled too much by force. A nice example of this?
I gave him my passwords for the pages where I usually hang around. So he basically has the possibility to read and check on all my stuff. (I donīt think he is using it much; perhaps he would, if I gave him reason for mistrust).
I did this voluntarily and on my own accord. It is a sign of trust and wanting to share.
If, however, he had said "you must give me all your passwords and report to me every conversation you have with anyone but me outside of your job", I would most likely have called him a control freak, and kicked his ass.
The magic for me is in a dom who makes me _want_ to do what he likes.
Not in a "dom" who excerts his will by brute force or because he claims "this is what a _real_ sub must do".