How did you find out about the BDSM lifestyle?

Very gradually. I have memories from decades ago of spanking a girlfriend but this, and most other forays into what seemed to be 'extreme' sex, were never met with the right response from my partner. With the internet I realised that BDSM was not just my lonely 'tortured' mind, but was far far greater ... all the way to being a lifestyle in some cases.


What was its appeal to you?

Total power, coupled with so much responsibility that it hurts. It appeals to both sides of my mind ... the evil and the gentle.


What misconceptions did you have of BDSM before you began that have been changed now?

That I was on my own. That all the pictures were false, that all the stories and lettters were just fantasies. That REAL people did not participate in something my upbringing told me was wrong.


What do you hope to learn/teach/pass on to others about BDSM?

As I am constantly learning, I doubt that I will live long enough to ever be able to teach or pass something on.


Do you consider yourself a "lifestyler" or just an occasional player?

Occasional player (and then only on line) .... but I live in hope.


What do you enjoy about being dominant/submissive?

The thrill of knowing my sub has been terrified by yet another of my ideas. The power to make her expand her own limits. The suspense of waiting to hear how her day went. The overwhelming pride when she achieves the impossible.


What do you like about your dominant/submissive(s), if you have one (them)?

That my beautiful sub will always try to her limit, and beyond. That she gives me hope.