H&HSC Mentoring Program...

[butterflySlave4u]

[denuseri]

hugs and kissess all,, i really feel as if mentorship is as much a privilage as a duty for we sisters in servitude and or submission to reach back and help those not so far down the road as we may be
we also can lend an ear or comfort to those beside us on the path

and i really would like to thank those special ones in who's footsteps i follow
without the trail they leave for me i would surely be lost indeed.

[butterflySlave4u]

[stripedangel]

y'all, i gotta tell ya i've been a member of other sites and they don't have groups like this. Sure, everybody is willing to help, they're all friendly and stuff, but it's not an organized setup for mentoring newbies.

Thanks.

xxxx

[Borgs_slave]

OK I have an issue and Master has given me his take and now I need more. I am helping a friend start a bdsm site. It is doing well and membership is growing, however, not many post on the forums or blogs as of it. So a few weeks ago a couple joined and were active, which was great. I added them to my friends list and so on. Well then they started posting sarcastic and condescending comments on my blogs and profile. He has become very snarky on others too. I am a mod too. I addressed it then his sub sent me this nasty, defensive message. So I let it go and when they did this again I addressed it. They are very passive aggressive and play innocent. I don't find it amusing at all.

It seems that he always has to one up someone and prove how wonderful he is. I am not the administrator so I can spank but not delete. I have gone to her several times and she is reluctant to kick them off because of "numbers". So I decided to ignore them I took them off my friends list and try not to interact them with them anymore than I have to but the snarkiness and passive aggressiveness towards me keeps on going. I am not leaving the site, two nasty people are not going to make me do that. How do I deal with them any differently and just let it go?

[Lady Hecate]

I am completely brand new to this lifestyle, and I have found a sub Trainer on this forum, and I do like Him very much.

But, that said, I do occasionally feel a little awkward about learning to behave in a 100% submissive way.

Like you, Bfly, I do realize that I have always been submissive. It has always taken an enormous effort for me to act like I am "in charge", and even then sometimes I have been told by others that I am not very convincing in that role.
For example, a few years ago I went to college and studied Early Childhood Education for a brief period. One of the teachers actually made the observation (ie.,she told me) that I always seemed more like a student than a teacher when I was working with my group of children. She never elaborated on that, but I know it was a general observation about me having a more submissive personality type.
But anyway, I digress lol! My point was, I do naturally lean toward being more submissive, but regardless of that, I still find it a bit of an adjustment to get used to the demands of a Dom/Domme.

So I am very happy to see that there are lots of other female subs out here who are willing to offer emotional support.
Thanks Bfly, and everyone, if I ever feel like I need to talk about sub-related issues again, I will make sure to get in touch with one of you.
Again, thanks, this is greatly appreciated.

[denuseri]

Borgs slave: i bet delia could help you in that department she has a lot of experience in that sort of thing i am sure

[butterflySlave4u]

[butterflySlave4u]

[skittles]

This is so wonderful. Being a newbie I am going to take advantage of all the help. So be prepared I will be PMing soon.

[butterflySlave4u]

[Flaming_Redhead]

Hey, y'all! *smiles* I'm not incredibly experienced, having been in the lifestyle for only 2 years, but I'll volunteer my PM box. I'm a 32-year-old hetero female switch. I was in a D/s relationship for a year and have been in an M/s relationship for 2 months. I love to talk, so feel free to drop me a line!

[moco]

wonders how such a good idea got forgotten about...

[denuseri]

It hasnt been forgoten at all moco.

The Womb is just one of many examples of how mentorship is carried on here, not to mention all the individual efforts of others.

[summerBreeze{EDQ}]

Butterfly I really appreciate the offer of help being very new to this all round. I am also a 50 year old and am hoping to educate myself here. I have already been aproached by some interesting men of various ages here offering to "help" train me etc or ask me very personal questions which I dont feel able to or even want to discuss with strangers and so far I have stood my ground and said no. I dont have the highest self esteem which is my problem and Im working on it but Im wondering if older subs have more of an issue because of the way we were brought up perhaps as well.
Anyway I just want to thank you for starting this thread and thank all the lovely helpful women here like Denuseri and others Ive met in chatwho have been very patient and kind to me here.

[ditzyblondegirl]

Hi Ladies, I am 38 and recently a o/l friend has introduced me to BDSM. He has recently become my Dom.

What makes a good submissive??

Tonight he asked me how much I weigh.. and I said no. I weigh too much.. lol then he said are you telling me no? and I said oh fine.. then i told him how much I weigh. I think I made a mistake.. I should have takin my punishment. I'm a curvy girl that is insecure around white males... now black males drool all over me. what makes my insecurity even worse is my Dom. is really hot!! and I would do just about anything to please him.

[moco]

Hi Ladies, I am 38 and recently a o/l friend has introduced me to BDSM. He has recently become my Dom.

What makes a good submissive??

Tonight he asked me how much I weigh.. and I said no. I weigh too much.. lol then he said are you telling me no? and I said oh fine.. then i told him how much I weigh. I think I made a mistake.. I should have takin my punishment. I'm a curvy girl that is insecure around white males... now black males drool all over me. what makes my insecurity even worse is my Dom. is really hot!! and I would do just about anything to please him.

In my opinion a good submissive is one who finds that they want to please another with their service, their actions.

also just my opinion...there is no such thing as ..too old, too fat, not submissive enough...etc.

Ok so you arent a "runway model" not many people are...and if your dom cant see the beauty that you are ...then he misses out. There are plenty of people in the world who will love you for who you are ...and not your measurements. There is more to you then just how much you weigh or how big your breasts are. Please believe that.

[summerBreeze{EDQ}]

Ditzyblondegirl I am 50, I am fat although Ive lost 40 pounds,I have saggy bits and my tits are going south fast and I am short and no oil painting I assure you. Yet I have a Mr who is 37 and says he doesnt care because I have other qualities he loves and I am in his words a" natural sub". Not that I know much but I am willing to please. So its quite honestly horses for courses.

[summerBreeze{EDQ}]

ok things have moved on and im no longer with my master but have another who wishes to train me and he is old school. He has given me a list of tasks but i need to know where to find a subs list can you help me?
Also where can I find out more about old school? I barely understand the here and now.

[denuseri]

First off is this some online person calling themselves a dom or someone you know in real life manou?

[summerBreeze{EDQ}]

I sent you a pm as I cant say on here just yet.

[angelic.zest]

Hi Ladies, I am 38 and recently a o/l friend has introduced me to BDSM. He has recently become my Dom.

What makes a good submissive??

Tonight he asked me how much I weigh.. and I said no. I weigh too much.. lol then he said are you telling me no? and I said oh fine.. then i told him how much I weigh. I think I made a mistake.. I should have takin my punishment. I'm a curvy girl that is insecure around white males... now black males drool all over me. what makes my insecurity even worse is my Dom. is really hot!! and I would do just about anything to please him.

him

What makes a good submissive? One that's true to herself/himself and appericate herself and knows that she is worth having a good dominant/top/master to help her, guide her/him.etc...If you felt abit uncomfortable with your weight, theres nothing wrong with that I am a plus size girl myself and I enjoy myself and so do men. Not everyone has the same level of self esteem as me and I know this so i dont expect you to just go right out and say it. You can always tell them from the there that you are curvy, plus size, luscious, thick..whatever word you want to choose! I dont think you did wrong, maybe the manner in which you told him "no...and oh fine" Theres always ways to still show respect and say no. It can be done..

[raineyswench]

This is a great part to this site, I have recently allowed myself to be awakened and it has started to answer questions that i've been asking all my life!! but I still have so much more to learn...god I don't even know what all the questions are but if anyone wants to share their experiences with me especially on starting out....i would appreciate them. I have started a blog to share my experiences, my feelings..... felt like I needed to get them out of my head to make any sense out of them!! and better on here than some other hide away!!

First question.....should I share blog with Him??

[denuseri]

That would depend on exactly who and what "Him" is to me if I were in your shoes.

Is he someone you know and trust in real life for a number of years...or someone you only know from online for the past few weeks?

[raineyswench]

That would depend on exactly who and what "Him" is to me if I were in your shoes.

Is he someone you know and trust in real life for a number of years...or someone you only know from online for the past few weeks?

He is some one I have known in real life for a few years but only recently in the last 6 months got a little closer sharing thoughts and stories and discoveries

[denuseri]

Do you cohabitate?

Are you dating or married?

See weather or not to share some things with him can depend on a wide variety of factors...factors only you know where and who you stand upon them.

Myself...meh, I dont do blogs, though I will share my thoughts on a forums, and as for diaries and writting assignments...well its better imho to just talk to him directly, but thats me.

Ultimately your the one who must decide for yourself how much if anything to share, or not with another.

[wyldrose]

Volunteering my PM inbox, i'm always available to listen or have a chat with anybody about anything at all. i'm rose, 20, and i've been involved with the Lifestyle in some way shape or form for over 5 years now. i'm a 24/7 collared slave in real life, so i can try to answer any questions anybody has. i know it's hard for young newbies to have somebody to talk to, so here i am!