Don't you love the ones who tell you that you must not be a true sub just because you don't fall to your knees and beg to serve them as soon as they introduce themselves?! I've had plenty of those comments when I was new and finding my way, but I also had a few really great mentors in this life and they helped me find my footing and discover my limits.

Keep searching and be honest, with yourself and with those you talk to. There is no need to apologize for wanting to go slow and learn as much as you can before jumping in and committing to anything. There isn't just one way to be a sub and no one way is necessarily the right way - only the right way for you or for your future Dom and you. Good luck - kuri