I was in a long distance relationship for almost 2 years. We were long distance for about 6 months, then moved in together for 5 months, and then he had to move back and we were long distance for another 13 months before we were able to see each other again. It was a vanilla relationship, but we did lots of things to try to stay connected to each other.

We talked just about every day, and at least a couple times a week on the phone. We used to send each other packages every month or two. (I knitted him a scarf once, bought him his favorite candies, sent him letters and photos [yes, sometimes *those* letters and photos ], etc. He made me a necklace once, would send me letters and photos and other misc. items.) The packages actually helped a lot, because we both looked forward not just to receiving a surprise, but also planning them. I also kept myself very busy with school and work so that I wouldn't feel lonely as often, and it also gave me more to talk about with him.

I've never tried having a BDSM relationship l/d, though. I imagine it would be a much different experience. The times I was l/d, it was excruciating. Like I said, I kept myself busy, I talked to him a lot, and we tried to send each other things once a month or so and all that did help, but it was still very hard.