Aloha

I know I am no sub and cannot aspire to be such but would love to give you my thoughts for what they are worth.

It is all a question of perception I think. In my eyes, if you are indeed submissive, I think it takes a huge amount of strength and character to be submissive, especially in current western (only ones I can relate to ) attitudes. Being submissive does not mean you have to be all the time. You can still ne a 'modern woman' in public whilst being submissive privately. Many are indeed this way and some struggle with it.

I look on subs as having the strength of charater to be able to give a measure of freedom to another. How many people can say they could? I think perhaps you are pressured more by what you fear others persceptions of you might be. I can understand that, we are all affected by those in some way. But I do console myself by remembering that FEAR stands for False Expectations Appearing Real. You might be surprised by what people actually think privately.

I hope my thoughts are helpful or/and interesting. Regarless good luck on your new adventure and remember to keep asking questions of the members here.

Regards and Mahalo Dragon