Originally posted by xtreamgrace
An online relationship is based on trust. You just do what you are told, and if a sub disobays and doesn't say anything their guilt proves as punishment. i do think there is a major flaw in the online thing, though.

-k
I think the only 'effective' online punishment, that can serve as punishment is the 'silent' treatment. Having a person ignore you, while your in the same chatroom or on msn or something like that, can be frustrating. If the two people are also communicating by phone as well, using voicemail to screen calls can emphasise the punishment. (This even sounds weird to me, but it just came to my mind)..and the funnier thing? These types of online punishments occur in non bdsm relationships as well.

A female acquaintence of mine, as an example, not in a bdsm relationship (although I don't see the difference, as mind games also contain elements of D/S etc) interrupted me how many times today by dropping by my house to check whether her 'ex' was online on goddamn Paltalk.. so I had to download it..only for her to find that he wasn't online. Now for a period of six months their relationship has the green light..then he gives it the red light..he says he might be interested in other people, she meanwhile agonizes over this to the point where she is torturing herself because in the meantime he is ignoring her online, via email and via telephone. Because I like to observe these 'dynamics' around me, I question her whether she must like it or get a subtle pleasure out of it.. however she shies away from the question. These are two people in a 'vanilla' relationship. Then out of the blue he'll call her, then she is on a high..then he'll go cold for a couple of days only to resume..reminds me of psychological experiments carried out on rats - press the lever you get food..or pavlovian conditioning..there is effectively no power exchange because it's all on his terms..however at the same time there is immaturity involved on both their behalves..

With the strictly online thing my philosophy is the following - for those relationships that are mainly carried out online , amongst people that are 'immature' or unevolved concerning their 'needs' or little respect to others -

As easy as it is for you to meet someone online, it's just as easy for them to meet someone online
Harsh maybe, but true in some situations..trust is relative in online relationships, and can only evolve 'effectively' once the relationship moves away from being online to being 'real life'.

but in regard to punishment 'online'.. just as silence is effective in real everyday life, it's perhaps more effective in online relationships.. perhaps even more so in 'full' online relationships.